Boring Boring Arsenal!

1) Mark King tells it like he sees it:

As a Club, I think we are in big trouble here. Let's take 2 things as set in stone:

1) Stan is not going anywhere, not for at least another 2 seasons anyway. Then he can sell and make a huge profit for an investment he could afford and very little work on his part. Some would say he may stay even longer given his record with other teams, but I think they may be forgetting 2 things, this is England not the US and we are talking proper football with ingrained die hard fans. So whilst he may consider himself safe in Denver, will he really want all the bad publicity that those fans can bring to his portfolio.

Who's funnier Will Ferrell or Stan Kroenke?

2) Mainly for the reasons above, AW will not be leaving unless he walks at the end of his contract in 2014 and let's face it, I can easily see an extension to that being offered this season if we pick up a little bit, as he is doing the job that Stan wants i.e. top 4 with minimal investment (total).

So if we accept the above, what happens now? Well, if we continue to win a game, lose a game, draw a game as we are at present, then come January and with all the money available we must buy 2 players. I would take Henry back as a squad player, ONLY AS LONG AS we also buy a top quality CF and by that I mean one of Cavani, JKH, Llorente or Lopez. If another player of that quality became available they would also be acceptable. Do players of this standard move in January? Not often. Do we pay the money they cost? Rarely! 

The other player needs to be something different for our midfield, so I would like Santa to bring either Capoue or Fellaini as we need a power player who will drive forward with the ball to complement our tiny ballers. Diaby could have been that player, but I think that the resurrection of Lazarus has now been cast aside as the latest offering from Derren Brown. Ideally I think we also need an experienced back up keeper and Leighton Baines, but I think I am pushing my luck now!

Problem is, January is the worst time to buy. No-one wants to sell their better players as they know it is difficult to replace them. Everyone also knows we are desperate, so the prices will go up and AW is already tighter than a duck's chuff as it is! Added to which, some of these players will be cup tied from Europe and possibly domestic and if they come from abroad there will obviously be a settling in period and you can never guarantee that works at all!

I feel that yet again we are in for Groundhog Season, which has actually become Groundhog Matchday for me. I travel to Arsenal for matches now with a distinctly 'meh' attitude. This is mainly because I have given up trying to predict which team will turn up; West Ham away or Norwich away, because I have never seen a top 4 team that could appears so different from one match to the other as we currently do! I think that finally the repetition of what we see has now ground down a lot of my willingness to hope!

Another Groundhog Season?

But I will still keep going, mainly because I am not sure if I can ever stop. I mean I didn't in the mid 70's when we were 50 shades of shit compared to now and just a kid enjoying the experience of being able to go. Even the period of Terry Neill and then Don Howe early to mid 80's wasn't enough to knock the monkey off my back. But am I still going now through habit rather than hope? Is it more social now than sporting, a chance to have a few beers with my mates and my nephew, who I don't see other than at THOF.

Yet again they gave us hope v the scum that they had realised what the problems were and had taken the necessary action to correct them. They built up our expectations, and like mugs we fell for it, got suckered in to reinvesting in the dream, only to find it was a Sinclair C5 and not an iPod! In the cold light of day and with an independent head on we should know that it was Ade who was the hero for us that day and not some renaissance! It is this constant raising and dashing of hopes that makes our support some of the tetchiest around. I can only imagine how much virtual blood gets spilled on the blog dancefloors during and post matches after performances like yesterday. I have no desire to join in with the carnage anymore.

Arsenal fan set against Arsenal fan. AKB v AWOB. Even that has got distinctly boring as it has become the EPL version of Housewives of NYC, everyone just shouting over each other, thinking that he who shouts loudest must be right and giving up any opportunity for reasoned debate.

Everyone used to sing "Boring Boring Arsenal" at us when George had the team drilled for the 1-0 wins. Did we care? Not while he was bringing home the bacon of which we had been so starved of. At least not until about 93/94 when we became purely a cup team and then in 95 when the football itself was pretty sub-standard. Then along came DB10 and then AW to show us the light, a light which never burned so brightly as in 04 with the greatest Arsenal team most of us will probably ever see.

Now though, I'm afraid we are back to the mid 70's and early 80's, some like Brian (no offence mate) may think it is heading towards the infamous bonfires on the terraces v Leeds, protesting at Billy Wright's tenure. Not because of the football, which at times can still be simply beautiful to watch, but because the whole situation around our club has become stale. The inconsistency of the team, the injury hit players, Arsene's tired post match comments, selling our best players, Stan & Ivan's contribution but most of all the bickering between the fans.

Congratulations one and all. We have got our Boring Boring Arsenal back at last!

Mark

Arsenal, J'Accuse!

MA8 had a bad hair day for once

Remember Buckaroo? That poor old mule as we kept piling spades, rope and buckets on it's back until at last, overwhelmed by the weight he would flip out! That is a lot of Arsenal fans at the moment and I have to say that I am that mule, looking at one of our players as he approaches me with the water bottle in his hand, trying to see where he can hang it. Yesterday it was Arteta and I'm afraid his judgement on hanging water bottles was as bad as that of hanging off the back of the Fulham player in our box!

Yours could well be in the attic

We have the AKB's, the AWOB's and we have the BSM who are the radical arm of the AWOB. I have no problem with any of these sides of the argument, it is after all a free country, which today of all days we should all remember. If you feel that somehow AW will still turn this around, then you have kept more faith than me, but that is your choice. Surely if Fergie can keep his powers going at his age and after so long in power, then Arsene must be able to? The main difference is that at MUFC they know one thing, no matter what is going on with the finances of a football club, if you can maintain a winning team or at least one which will realistically challenge every year for trophies, then you can pretty much fool most of the people all of the time.

At AFC, those in power have forgotten this, or worse still have decided that they don't care about any form of protest over the malaise sweeping the club as in reality there is very little the fans can do about it. If the BSM feel they can make a difference then good luck to them. Personally I agree with a lot of what they are saying about greed in football, but I just cannot see that they have any power to be anything other than a voice in the wilderness. They are a minority of our fanbase, a higher percentage of those that attend games maybe than they are of the overall fanbase, but I still think they will be shouted down (not literally) by the larger majority who either see AW as a God on earth or those who simply see protest as counter productive to the playing side.

We have seen that at the top of this club we are viewed as a necessary evil, an inconvenience that must be put up with, at least for a few more years. My opinion is that once we have new sponsorship deals in place and have reduced the debt on the club, then Silent Stan will sell up to the highest bidder and walk away with a very healthy profit on his initial investment. All he has to do is stay in Denver, well away from any of the grubby little soccer fans that are not happy, let Ivan take all that heat and let AW keep us in the top 4.

Is Usmanov the answer? Well he is if fans think he will come in and provide a warchest, allowing AW to buy the 20 mill version of Arteta or the 40 mill upgrade on Giroud, plus pay the kind of wages that the football dogs of war crave nowadays. Would we have lost the best left back in world football under Usmanov, or would Theo have signed his new 100k contract by now? Is AW a better manager than Mancini or RDM? Of course he is, so imagine what he could do with the kind of squad at their disposals. Obviously there are very strong arguments about 'selling your footballing soul' to the money merchants or those who would feel very uncomfortabl having a man own the club with a shady (allegedly) past! How many of those would be prepared to swallow this bitter pill in order to see our skipper lift the ECL and PL trophies again? I think it would be interesting to see fans quickly forget their original opposition if we had a winning team once more. I for one am sick of seeing this team continually raise our hopes only to show that as a squad we are weak, in terms of attitude, spirit, depth and talent. I see so many Gooners who buy in to a run of performances and results, building their hopes up, investing more of their emotions in to the possibility of success only to have them dashed by a display of such ineptitude as shown at Norwich. I really fear for the long term health of these fans!

Personally, I think it would be nice to have someone in charge of the club who may make their intentions clear, even if this may be lip service to the fans, just as the R&W letter was after Voldermort penned his website resignation letter. But what I would like to see is some accountability brought back to the club. Currently I can see no circumstances under which AW would be sacked and given how drastic things may need to get for that to happen nor do I! But, if the section of fans who want rid are right and regardless of owner, AW has had his day and cannot compete in the post Abramovich and now oil rich era, then it would be nice to think that AFC could take the action required to do the best for this glorious football club and not that just for the shareholders to whom we are a turkey being plumped up for Christmas! For the BSM, I hope they continue to campaign, as long as it does not happen during games and impact the players at that time. I do feel however, they are pissing in the wind, but at least they are standing up for what they believe and doing something.

Cares more about rugs than fans or football

 

To those fans upset by the BSM who feel it is divisive and they should get behind the club no matter what, remember this, which I am sure you can all adapt for your own personal circumstances and history. Outside of my immediate family, the most important thing in my life is The Arsenal. Not a day goes by when it doesn't enter my life in some way or another, be that on the web or chatting with a mate. This has been how the die was cast since the early 70's and I have been lucky enough to be able to follow the team in person for a large chunk of this period. Whilst we have been lucky to have some great times, more so than plenty of other club's fans, we also manage to put ourselves through the mill. Some teams are either brilliant or mediocre, say Liverpool for example. Some may have had a few shining moments of brilliance amongst long periods of failure, Villa and Forest spring to mind and of course some have only the faded sepia photos taken on a box brownie to remind them of a long since passed period of success (no points for guessing this club). The thing with us is we seem to chug along being there or thereabouts for long periods, remaining tantalisingly close to the glory days, but then managing to have them snatched away, normally through our own errors! But the fact remains that we are there, normally being written off by the press and pundits, but clinging on to a faint hope that this year AW will get it right. Of late every season seems to start, pan out and end the same way!

To finish, a few weeks back there was a Sunderland blog, bemoaning the fact that we are a very spoilt and whiny bunch of fans, to be complaining about only finishing in the ECL positions every year and not winning the quadruple instead. I can understand a certain part of his viewpoint but have to say this in response. No-one knows this club better than us fans, and having basked in the glory of 98-05 when AW made us the superpower-in-waiting we could become due to our location, proposed new stadium, fanbase and playing squad, we have seen a gradual decline. Now we all knew that there were tough times ahead, all down to the building of a 60k ground, in London, during a recession and so near to our last ground, but this cannot be used as an excuse for all that has happened since Paddy took his last 12 yard kick of a ball for the club.

We have seen every year AW produce teams that have promised so much, yet eventually have turned out to be made of straw. The list of top quality and brilliant players we have loved and lost is by now infamous. The self induced collapses due to weak mentality and lack of leadership haunts all of us. So forgive us Gooners if we have a moan, but to be honest if we were shit and basically always had been, like say, maybe Sunderland, then we would not moan quite so much. But that's the thing, we all know we are perpetually so close, that we are only 2 or 3 players away from success and eradicating the specific problems that beset our team. Add this to the knowledge that your club has the resources available, a magnificent stadium in one of the greatest cities in Europe and a world class manager. Knowing all this yet seemingly said manager is too stubborn, or your board too selfish to release the funds, then you are entitled to be frustrated, mystified and pissed off.

It's the hope that kills you!

Mark

Notes for those who don't do abbreviations:
AWOB Arsene Wenger Out Brigade
AKB Arsene Knows Best
BSM Black Scarf Movement
PL Premier League 
AW The Manager
ECL European Champions League 
PHW Senile old git
R&W Red and White Holdings (Jabba's shareholding company)
SK Disinterested rug owner who cares sweet FA about Arsenal

A win is a win is a win.

Quite a few fans feel the need for a rant following today's Arsenal game. Well so do I but not a rant about the Arsenal. My rant is about the ref because Anthony Taylor was very worthy of a rant. What a piss-poor apology for a ref he is, without doubt the weakest ref in the Premiership. 6-yard walls for free kicks that took ten minutes to build, Cazorla freely trampled on a regular basis, no concept of advantage, even less concept of how and when to deploy yellow cards, the red wasn't even his idea - he got a message from his lino. This was an abject performance from the man in the yellow shirt with the yellow streak up its back. Sometimes 'you don't know what you're doing chants' are misguided, but not today.

Before the game I'd have taken any sort of win, during the game I'd have taken any sort of win and after the game I was delighted that we'd won. Being pleased with a victory would appear to be a lost art for many Arsenal fans though judging by tonight's internet rantings. The Twatterarti  are still out in force and the forums are full of moaners. Must be the rareity of a three o'clock kick off that's set them off.

What a welcome sight

We were a long way from being brilliant but there were a few signs that we were at least better than fairly pathetic which had been the case in our previous two outings. Battling till the end and deserving the win wasn't outstanding or sufficient cause to open Champagne. But at least it was a move in the right direction for which I'm grateful. Jack looked knackered after 10 minutes but if he can survive the knocks, and he had a fair number today which made me hold my breath till he got up again. He's back though and will get sharper, and when he does he'll be like the much required breath of fresh air. Good also to see Theo back for a brief showing, whatever anyone thinks of him we've missed his pace. Sagna reminded us that he's a class act without ever really looking comfortable in his first game of the season, I thought he did well to last the ninety minutes although having said that he's a long way off 100% fit. Playing two unfit players was a big gamble I wasn't sure about, but it paid off. Just. Santos is still a worry, he didn't play anyone onside today but had he done so the lino wouldn't have noticed anyway.

No match should pass by without mention of Cazorla who is just such a clever ball player and absolutely remarkably two-footed. He's a delight to watch and currently about the only player to give real value for the money. So we had one two-footed player, five left-footed players and five right-footed players starting today. It should have been a perfectly balanced team but our forwards are still lacking something. Namely the desire to shoot.

Feel sorry for Gervinho who looks to have a bad injury and sorrier still that it leaves us with even fewer options unless we can get the Ox fit again. That said today's silver lining was the AA man's fabulous cross, I'm not his biggest fan but credit where credit is due.

I do so hope that Hughes yet again looses his job this season, how he still actually has a job is a mystery, but the bigger question has to be why does anyone ever hire him as a manager in the first place?

Brian @Gooner48

Wilf Copping - Arsenal's hardest ever player?

Of all the hard men who've ever played for Arsenal I reckon there's one, who if his photograph was anything to go by, was meaner than all the rest. That player was Wilf Copping a dour ex-miner from Yorkshire. His legendary toughness was confirmed to me by my late Grandfather, who claimed that Wilf was the hardest player he ever saw play at Highbury. The fact that Copping didn't shave on matchdays almost certainly enhanced this conception. He played for us in the thirties in a position which was then known as left half, which roughly translated means, he was a left sided defensive midfield player who wore the number six shirt. Wilf was born in Middlecliffe, Barnsley but failed to get a place with his local club despite attending trials as a youngster. Their loss was Leeds gain.

Wilf Copping - the hard man's hard man

Born in August 1909 Copping signed for Leeds in March 1929 and was an ever present throughout the 1930-31 season when he was an essential part of a very strong half back line which comprised Edwards, Hart and Copping. Between 1929 and 1934 in his first spell at Leeds he played in over 160 league games, appeared six times for England and represented the Football league on two occasions. Herbert Chapman had started negotiations with Leeds for Copping's signature at a time when Arsenal were searching for a suitable replacement for Bob John, who despite having been a tremendous asset to the team, was by now in his mid-thirties. But the great manager's untimely death meant that it was George Allison who completed the deal for the sum of £8,000 in June 1934.

He made his league debut for the Gunners on the opening day of the 1934-5 season, on the 25th of August at Fratton Park, where Arsenal drew 3-3 with Portsmouth. His first season at Highbury saw the Club win our third consecutive League Championship. Despite being a regular visitor to Whittakers treatment room Copping had missed only two games up until March when he suffered a very serious knee injury at Goodison Park. It was a match in which Arsenal needed a point at least. Frank Moss, our keeper, had injured his shoulder and was playing on the wing. Eddie Hapgood, the fullback, having already replaced Frank in goal by the time Wilf was injured. Remember in these days substitutes did not exist. Being the man he was Copping played on in extreme pain against Everton with his knee tightly bandaged and nearly fainted with pain at the end of the match when the bandage was removed. Amazingly Arsenal managed a 2-0 win and Moss was one of the scorers. However as a result of this injury Copping was put out of action for the remainder of the season.

In his first season with Arsenal he also managed to add two England caps to his tally including that most famous of matches when Arsenal, sorry, England beat the World Champions Italy 3-2 at Highbury in November 1934. The "Battle of Highbury" as it was known saw England field a team that included seven Arsenal players. The magnificent seven were Wilf, Ray Bowden, George Male, Frank Moss, Eddie Hapgood, Ted Drake and Cliff Bastin. This match was rated as one of Copping's finest and some felt that at times he was almost playing Italy on his own. He obviously revelled in the heat of the battle, and this one saw Italy play in what was somewhat politely reported as an 'over-vigorous' manner. Eddie Hapgood, rather more bluntly, described the game as the dirtiest match he'd ever played in. Such a game suited Wilf who was known as 'The Ironman' due to his legendary toughness.

Wilf was the first to admit that he could also be described as temperamental and fiery. Yet despite this and his well-earned reputation for bone-jarring tackles the indications are that they were generally perfectly timed and fair. Although how this quite squares with Eddie Hapgood's description of Wilf's 'famous double-footed tackle', I'm not too sure. He looked harder than perhaps he was, possibly intentionally, and his image was enhanced by the somewhat sinister looking blue stubble that he sported on matchdays. Copping was also famously quoted as saying 'The first man in a tackle never gets hurt' and if you've ever played the game you'll have to agree that's difficult to argue against. Another great quote on Copping comes from Bill Shankley recalling a clash in the 1938 England - Scotland match: 'The grass was short, the ground was quick and I was playing the ball. The next thing I knew, Copping had done me down the the front of my right leg. He had burst the stocking - the shin pad was out - and cut my leg. That was after 10 minutes and it was my first impression of Copping. He didn't need to be playing at home to kick you - he would have kicked you in your own back yard or in your own chair...'

Wilf was also, according to Tom Whittaker, very temperamental in the dressing room. Tom had to ensure that no one spoke to Wilf before a game or he'd blow his top. He was also extremely superstitious, always putting his left boot on first and insisting on being the sixth (his shirt number) man out of the dressing room.

During his time at Highbury Wilf was the best of friends with Jack Crayston, described by Tom Whittaker as an elegant gentleman of the football field. Crayston and Copping were as different as chalk and cheese both on and off the pitch. But not only did they train together, they also always paired up on away trips, often a train journey, to play a peculiar form of Chinese whist in order to pass the time.

Copping played 33 league games in the 1935-6 season and was a member of the F A Cup winning team that beat Sheffield United 1-0 in the final. He only missed four matches of the 1936-7 season which saw the club finish in a lowly third place. The following season he again missed just four games in Arsenal's successful Championship campaign of 1937-38. The season that followed, 1938-39, was his final one with the Arsenal because in the March of he was transferred back to Leeds. As Copping had told the then trainer, Tom Whittaker. "I'm going to ask for a transfer... I feel war is coming and I want to get my wife and kids back up North before I join the Army." It was for this and no other reason that a legend left a successful team. Copping had made twenty appearances for England before the outbreak of the Second World War. With the Arsenal he had won two League Championships and the F A Cup and had also played in four Charity Shield matches. Had it not been for the War it could well have been more.

We can't really compare Wilf Copping to the modern players but one thing is for sure, he was without doubt a hard player but a fair one. In the 185 league and Cup games he played for our club he wasn't once booked or sent off. In his time with the Arsenal his powerful, crunching tackles earned him a deserved legendary status.

During the war Copping reached the rank of Company Sergeant Major and served with the army in North Africa. It would have been a very brave soldier who didn't obey the orders of this great man.

Wilf's Stats:

Wilf Copping - position Left Half (defensive midfield)
Born at Middlecliffe, Barnsley, Yorkshire on 17 August 1909
Died June 1980 aged 70
Signed from Leeds in June 1934 for £8,000
Played for Arsenal 1934-35 to 1938-39
Debut v Portsmouth away 3-3 League 25 August 1934
Played 20 times for England (7 while with Arsenal)
2 Football League Caps
League matches     played 166
F A Cup     19
Charity Shield     4
Arsenal total     189
League Championship medals 1934-35 1937-8
F A Cup winner 1935-36
Charity Shield winner 1934-35 1938-39
Charity Shield finalist 1935-36 1936-37
One of the record breaking 7 Arsenal players who played for England v Italy

© Brian Dawes 2000 originally published on the Jack Kelsey Fan Club website (defunct)

Arsenal Book Review - Woolwich Arsenal FC: 1893-1915

Woolwich Arsenal FC: 1893-1915 - by Tony Attwood, Andy Kelly and Mark Andrews
Reviewed by Brian Dawes

This comprehensive and reasonably priced book is subtitled 'The Club That Changed Football'. Now I'm not going to pretend that this book would be ideal for every Arsenal fan because many fans are clearly only interested in what's going on currently or what's going to happen next week. Thankfully however, due mainly to our fabulously interesting history, we also have many Arsenal history buffs. And for all these students of the Club this 234 page volume is certainly an absolute must for every Gooner who has a serious eye for Arsenal's early history.

It's perfectly clear even from merely flicking through and viewing the many tables, photos, press cuttings and cartoons that this book has been very seriously researched. If you turn to the back of the book, as you should with any serious work of history, viewing the bibliography will reveal that the sources are quite simply more definitive than any previous early history of the Arsenal. I'd even suggest that the research, some of which must have taken years to undertake is as definitive as it is currently possible to be. So much so that other Arsenal authors will have to make revisions to the standard concept on some aspects of Arsenal's early history. Which in a nutshell is why this book is a must for all Arsenal history buffs, they'll learn many new things about Woolwich Arsenal, just as I have.

Once you start reading its not hard to believe that is the best researched early history on Arsenal that has ever been undertaken, and that's impressive given that so much research has been done on this subject already. It's been well put together without becoming a humourless series of dry facts. In fact some of the characters described are almost impossible to invent.  You've also got to love a book which gives the crowd at Woolwich their very own chapter, but you'll see why this is so when you come to read it. By way of example few will know that Charlie Buchan, then a schoolboy, was at the1906 FA Cup fixture against Sunderland and he paid his entrance fee by selling one of his schoolbooks. But my favourite antidote refers to a Bradford called Bond who was suspended by the FA for one month after he was alleged to have sworn in the presence of two sisters who were seated in the Arsenal stands.

Arsenal's progress in the League and Cup are each afforded separate chapters. Each season is discussed as a whole in the League section, a good decision given that the facts and figures are available in numerous other sources. The FA Cup matches are covered game by game including the Qualifying matches. Arsenal historians will be well aware, but and it may surprise some that despite this being a long time prior to any major successes for the Club we did in fact compete in two FA Cup semi-finals as Woolwich Arsenal, both of which are well covered.

The chapter on 'The men who played for Woolwich Arsenal' has done the sensible thing and concentrated on the most influential and interesting players of the period. That said, it still covers over 50 players in 36 pages, doing so in a manner that is very far from being a dry statistical rehash of facts and figures. The following chapter that covers our managers is equally well rounded.

If this book lacks anything it is probably detail about the authors, all of whom have proved very worthy in adding great value to this fabulous historical undertaking. This work clearly wasn't done for the money, despite its fine authoritative detail matching any academic work you might come across on almost any subject. It's an obvious case of writers doing something simple because they care deeply enough to make it happen. I know for example that Andy has been systematically collecting and collating data for many years and its great to see his diligent research bear fruit at long last. Tony you can more find more about by trawling the internet, or perhaps by reading his factional title 'Making the Arsenal'. Mark I know nothing about other than the fact that anyone who writes a Dissertation relating to Arsenal for an MA in Twentieth Century Historical Studies is fine by me.

As I said at the beginning of my review this isn't a book to suit every Arsenal fans' taste, but certainly a book that is an absolutely essential addition to every Arsenal History buff's library. I believe it will stand as the ultimate authority on its subject matter for many years to come.

Woolwich Arsenal FC: 1893-1915
by Tony Attwood, Andy Kelly and Mark Andrews
Published by Hamilton House
ISBN 978 1 86083 787 6
Paperback £14.95

The book has been written by the founders of the Arsenal History Society, Tony Attwood, Andy Kelly, Mark Andrews. The Society is part of AISA, the Arsenal Independent Supporters Association. You can buy the book direct from the publishers on line or by phone to 01536 399 011, or you can place an order by fax on 01536 399 012

The Free Membership Box

As you'll know if you're a Platinum, Gold, Silver or Red Member at Arsenal you eventually receive a 'free' membership box each season. I have no idea if the Diamond Club get theirs thrown in but somehow doubt it. My free box cost me a grand or so this season. The box invariably contains what the Club consider to be 'goodies' and because I don't ever recall anyone else doing so I thought I might review them for once - so that's what I've done below:

This year its a nice red solid square heavy cardboard box inscribed with some marketing bullshit that doubtless some overpaid marketing nerd was overpaid to dream up, it reads:

'I am a Fan

I am a Member

I am

Always Ahead of the Game'

Well actually no you're not ahead of the game, especially so if you rely on www.Arsenal.con for your Arsenal news updates or informed opinions. And should anyone from Arsenal be reading this I'd be quite happy to come up with some much better and vastly cheaper marketing bullshit for next season...say for the price of my season ticket.

The 2012/13 Handbook - an annual gem

On the plus side this season the box contains the 2012/13 Official Handbook which I have to say is good news personally because I regard this little gem as an excellent source of information, I usually purchase a copy and so this in itself has saved me a fiver that can now be wasted on a cheap bottle of wine. Good call Arsenal.

Then there's an Arsenal keyring, this one I actually quite like and it will prove useful one day. But then again they've given us key rings in the past so they're clearly scratching around for ideas. This comes in its own sweet little box, which is entirely useless for anything other than the keyring. But instead of throwing this box away I'll probably keep it for a year or two imagining that I'll find a use for it - and then throw it away.

There are six postcards included probably because they're both flat and cheap, five of which are absolutely fine although they wouldn't all be to my own personal choice. But one hasn't really been thought through because it includes Van Purse-strings appearing in the background of a Vermaelen goal celebration. I mean really - how difficult would it have been to Photoshop the **** out of the picture?

There's the inevitable credit-card sized fixture list. Like we've not all see the fixtures already.

There's a cheap pair of in-the-ear type headphones in plastic box which advertises ArsenalPlayer. Now if you're a member surely you're already aware of ArsenalPlayer and if you're over the age of 10 you've almost certainly already got a superior headset even if you nicked a seriously crabby set on your last  plane trip, or whatever. I can't even think of anyone I'd want to give these away to just to annoy them.

Also included is a scratch card which encourages punters to gamble on Gunnersgambling which is run by Betsson. I've not scratched my scratch card as yet, and maybe never will, but I'd be prepared to bet I'll win the £10 free bet rather than a signed shirt. But of course I'd only get the £10 free bet if I register an account. Personally I prefer alternative addictions to gambling such as alcohol. You can also win loads of poker chips for Casino, but only if you match them pound for pound should you choose to open an account. It says of course you have to be over 18 to receive this bonus, so is it just possible that this has also gone out to under 18's? I do hope not.

The original and superior Hardback version

And finally the inevitable book. I love books and I particularly love Arsenal books, but I've yet to receive one in the Arsenal Members pack that I have not already read. This season's free book is no exception. It's an abridged paperback edition of Arseblog's very wonderful 'So Paddy Got Up'. It's a good read but not as good obviously as the full Monty which I reviewed here some time back http://www.thehighburylibrary.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/so-paddy-got-up.html

Santi Cazorla or Geordie Armstrong?

I know he's less than ten competitive games into his Arsenal career but even so it's taken a while for some pundits and most punters to catch on to the seemingly natural two-footed nature of Santi Cazorla. There were some of us who picked up on it very early doors but two-footed players are even less common than the left-footed ones so its maybe not surprising that many had to have it pointed out to them. Most players these days can play off either foot but its mainly a matter of degree as to just how well, a simple short range pass is all most will attempt. With Santi he looks just so natural on either foot that it would be a waste of time for a defender to try and work him onto his wrong one even if they could figure which it was. As it happens Santi is right footed but you certainly wouldn't know that by watching him shoot or play, in fact I only know that because it is what Wenger has said so.

Santi: Right or left footed?

Wenger's quote on him was: ‘Santi is right footed but when you watch him play you don’t know. It shows how important that is in the modern midfield. Right or left foot was always important, but we forget about it sometimes. I’m surprised there are not more.’

You'd have to a agree with Wenger about that. I doubt that many think about the left-right balance too much but Wenger has always attempted to balance his sides with both and over the years we've had our share of left-footed players. None more so than Nigel Winterburn who was so one-footed it looked positively awkward at times, but even he scored one with his right peg. The fact that there are not more seemingly natural two-footed players around surprises Wenger and in this day and age it surprises me. He sited Glenda Hoddle as one such, but a far better example would be Bobby Charlton in my opinion. Sir Bobby was a right-footed player who played wide-left in his early career to his later advantage, and to England's as it happens.

For Arsenal we've had quite a few who can use either foot effectively but none so naturally as Santi. I say that because I really wouldn't have known if he was right or left footed if Arsene hadn't said so. The only other Arsenal player I can recall being so totally two-footed was George Armstrong. Geordie of course was a legend who graced our first Double side with two quality feet and an engine the likes of which you'll hardly ever see again. He was by trade a winger but was in effect an engine room who would play down either or both flanks, often in the same game. Uniquely I believe he was the only player I've ever seen who could strike both inswinging and out-swinging corners from either flank with either foot. How he never played for England is quite unbelievable. Mainly you'd suspect because Alf Ramsey had abandoned wingers altogether, but that's another story.

Arsenal's most two-footed player ever?

Meanwhile back at our current two-footed Spanish gem, he really is a rather tasty player isn't he. But can he maintain such form throughout a season? Or maybe he can even improve further as he comes to grips with the English game. Only time will tell, but he already matches Geordie in my eyes regarding his two-footed skills. Better yet he appears to be absolutely loving his football with Arsenal as much as we're all enjoying his play.

Brian Dawes @Gooner48